March 2001: More crazy ideas to keep you stared-at while in Thailand Hi, there's a new attraction at Damnoen Saduak Floating Market: Me and my Kayak ! Normally I consider floating markets a boring affair, designed to trick tourists into the believe that Thais don't shop at malls, don't drive cars and don't use handphones. Well, I called it an "exercise" and managed to convince myself that at least once during my assignment in Thailand, I'd have to visit a floating market. Summary of my half-day exercise: Overnight at Nok Noi Hotel (Little Bird Hotel). Friendly, rather clean, spacious, quiet. Fan room THB170. Early next morning, drive to waypoint JETTY1, the jetty nearest to the hotel. Parking under the bridge. Assembly of boat done in the area under the roof, a spot that will later turn into a food court. Few people there, but I get enough spectators. Talaat Ton Khem is less than 1.5 km from the jetty, no big deal. I reach there at 8am. It's pretty congested at the market, no space for my long kayak paddle. I'm glad the paddle can be disassembled, so I pack half of it away and use the other half to paddle my kayak like a Thai boat. Luckily my boat has a steering rudder, this helps a lot when space is so tight that I can not use the half-paddle. Surprisingly, a lot of Thais are very busy trading their produce so that I ask myself, where are the hordes of tourists ? I enter a "sideroad" and dock at a Khui Tiau boat for breakfast. The lady does me noodle soup, nice with tiny shrimps and fish, costs THB10. Must be the early-bird discount. I manage to finish my meal without capsizing or spilling the soup into my boat, though I get filmed by a tourist. After breakfast, it's almost 9am, eventually the tourists come in larger numbers. They hurry through on their THB300 per boat / 1 hour / see-it-all tours, steadily pushing through the market. I have to stay away from them, to avoid damage to my little craft. The paddle is now less useful: There are so many boats around me, that I move ahead by pulling on them. More Thais try to sell me souvenirs while more tourist include me in their videos. I top up fuel, buying snacks here and there. Then police comes around in a speedboat, I wonder if THB100 would be an appropriate pribe for whatever I might have done wrong. Well, the folks are simply entertained by my presence. Have to be a bit careful with their long-tail, these tails are longer than one would expect. At 10am, I decide to cruise a bit outside the congested market. There's heavy tourist traffic on the waterways around. Every few seconds one boat coming past, fast and and making waves, disturbing my inferiour craft. These cowboys cut across bends and leave little space for me to fit between them and the walls of the canal. Their bows are so high, I fear they don't see me. I wished I had a big horn. I then spend some time on smaller canals, off the "mainroad", which is more scenic and free of speeding tourists. Still there is the occassional speedboat, the equivalent to a souped-up motorcycle, which forces me out of the way. It's a wide network of canals, fun exploring, more fun with a GPS. Nuisances are mosquitos that go into my boat, dogs that suddenly turn up and bark wildly (the bilge pump does a great job splashing them) and the everpresent sound of motors, firing my fear that suddenly a speedboat could shoot around the corner and hit me. Back to the market at 11am, it's mostly a tourist thing. Prices for food have climbed. A lot of the boats have disappeared and getting through is easier. Vendors have not much to do and try harder to sell me their woodcarvings. After a few more snacks, I plug my paddle back together to full length, then head full steam towards my car. So far the floating market. On the way back, I do my shopping at Tops. Just push the trolley along, easy to turn, easy to stop, pay credit card at the checkout... It's the better thing. Floating market is a loser. Don't invest there ! Regards, Martin